The Third Wheel

It started with a random local guy I was chatting with on a mIRC room some months back. Not surprisingly, as soon as we were done with the ASL nonsense he got right down to it and asked to go a few rounds of cyber-sexing with him.

A little amused at his up-frontness, I told him I wasn’t interested in such silliness and that the ‘real thing’ was what I was after. Yes, I can be a bit of a tease with some of these jerks who try to feel you up through their PCs. Next he wanted to see a picture of me (yes, preferably naked) and ended up, with a little cajoling from me, by sending me a heavily photoshopped picture of his smiling mug. He was a nice looking fella, I suppose, a bit young (around 18 or so despite his assurance that he was 25) if I were any judge of being able to correctly see through the distortion filters but by then I was losing interest in chatting with him. He was exactly like the hundreds of horny guys you meet in a chat-room; the elusive and rare ‘interesting guy with a great personality’ was nowhere to be found that night, if he even exists.

So I said that what I was really looking for at the moment was a girl to… you know, “experiment” with. On hindsight, that was probably the worst thing you could possibly say to get a guy to lose interest in you.

“You’re a lesbian!?” he exclaimed.

Now, I will tell you right now that I am NOT a lesbian. I’m not bi either but it wouldn’t be too far of the mark to say that I’m bi-curious. I tried to explain the difference but he wasn’t really listening. Before I knew what was happening, he had practically invited himself over to my next “lesbo-session” and had promised to only “watch… unless… you WANT me to join you girls for some fun!”. He even gave me his frekkin phone number!!!


That first guy was some random guy in an Internet chat room that I don’t even know or care about. Even so, I was still reeling from the way his attitude towards me had changed in a heartbeat. In less than two seconds, I had gone from someone who was interested in “sexually getting it on with another girl” to someone looking to “have a threesome”! How in frikkin seven hells did he make that leap in logic? Was there some secret code involved that I didn’t know about? He even thought I was a lesbian so what the fuck was he doing inviting himself over? Wishful thinking that a lesbian would just keel over and convert into a bisexual woman at the mere sight of his cock? It doesn’t even make sense.

That was the first time. The second time was worse.

Me and three other friends (a girl and two guys; let’s call them Aisha, Ali and Ahmed) were over at the Mövenpick in Hulhule’ and just shooting the breeze. There was a foreign couple there too (Italian I think) and they were being all lovey-dovey, kissing and necking. One of my guy friends finally commented that the girl was really hot.

“Yes, she really looks like a super-model or something,” I contributed. And she really did look like she could be. For that I got teased about checking out girls and I decided to go with the flow.

“I wouldn’t even mind kissing her; she’s hot!” I shot back.

That’s when things got out of hand. These were friends I had known since school and probably the closest friends I had who were still in Male’. Except for Ahmed, who I became friends with when he hooked up with my friend Aisha a couple of months ago.

Aisha acted all shocked and disgusted, saying that she was feeling a little freaked and warning me not to ever look at her ‘that’ way! Ali and Ahmed on the other hand were looking excited and had this shit-eating grin on their faces. Long story short: Later that day I got a call from Ahmed. He’s like “soooo, I have this girl friend who’s looking for some girl-on-girl action. You interested?” Apparently the girl wasn’t looking for anything serious, just casual sex. Ahmed also offered us the use of his apartment, the video equipment in his small studio, and assured me that he would be downstairs and available if his company was ‘required’ upstairs.

I hung up on the bastard and seriously considered calling up Aisha and telling her. But I didn’t. And if she ends up reading about it on my blog… well then, I’m sorry girl. 🙂 Don’t tell me you never suspected.

So… it seemed to me that admitting that I wouldn’t mind kissing a girl that I found to be attractive automatically made me a slut, ready to get into a fucking threesome with just about anyone. How did that happen? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK!!!

There was another incident too but I won’t go into that, except to say that it was a married couple who were looking to spice things up in their sex life. And the spice just happened to be me. I don’t even know how they even got my number (apparently the word is out!) but I am really not fucking interested, literally. If I wanted to lock lips with a girl then I can very well find one on my own, thank you very much.

The really sad thing about this is that I haven’t even done anything. I admit that the thought of kissing a girl intrigues me but I’m wild by nature and I like the sense of embarking on new adventures and going through new experiences. It’s the thrill of living that drives me on. I’m attracted to black men too and the thought of being with a black guy thrills me, but I don’t just go over to any random black guy and fuck him. It would be kinda exciting, I admit, but I doubt any self respecting girl would do that unless you were really drunk or high or something. You guys need to work up a sweat if you want some of what we girls can offer. Same rules apply to everyone, regardless of gender.

So I wonder, what is it about some Maldivian guys that makes them think that just because a girl is looking to check out the other side of the pond, that they’ve been automatically invited to tag along and bring the picnic basket?


12 comments so far

  1. anamelol on

    the answer to your question is that they’re Maldivian. we like to butt in everywhere (pun intended)

  2. Anonymous on

    this sounds all too familiar for me hehhe and i don’t think it’s Maldivian men alone, i think it’s men in general

  3. penny on

    oops the above anonymous is me btw

  4. .mini on

    i agree with penny, its men in general
    just cannot imagine people doing those stuff here

  5. Shadow Runner on

    Hey, it happens; why?. We’re bored.

    PS: LMFAO at the chatroom boi. You should’ve told him at the end that you were a guy.

    Then step back and watch bricks being shat.

  6. bandey on

    Seriously does everyone have a football for a brain?? humanity and compassion towards women are null in these peoples brains. the specific group of people you outlined in your post above.
    good rambling btw. my apologies on behalf my football headed cousins..

  7. Iya on

    i know what you are talking about. in the chat rooms, i mean. if it is a maldivian chat room, there are the usual perverts who look for an online feelski, and then there are the closed group inside joke ppl. if the room is foreign, it is too much filled with pervs. DAIM!!

    the internet used to be a place where you can meet new and interesting people with different cultures and personalities. alas, how it has decayed to this…

    also, this ahmed is a fucking cockbite. not to say that a threesom is something i would pass up… but i would do it the legit way. 😀

  8. Shihana on

    @anamelol: You’re really speaking on behalf of all Maldivians? Who died and made you the frikkin leader?

    @penny: hmmm interesting. But so far, none of my guy friends from abroad have done anything like that.

    @mini: doing what stuff? Having sex or bisexual relationships?

    @Shadow Runner: I actually do that occasionally. It’s quite fun to watch the bricks.

    @bandey: apology accepted. Tell them not to do that again.

    @Iya: So there’s a legit way to do it? I hope you don’t mean to drag religion into this. I probably won’t mind a threesome either but the point I’m making is that most guys seem to think their presense is a requisite by default.

  9. anamelol on

    I would lean towards the majority of maldivians. i’m not one to categorize them all this way, taking into account my own experiences.
    The said majority would be those that fall under the category of a typical maldivian, those that promote and practice the numerous contemptuous characteristics that can be reasonably, and sometimes exclusively, attributed to maldivians.

    Let me ask you this, when you meet these people, be it in real life or on the internet, are you really surprised? I know I wouldn’t be (if I were you).

    now don’t misunderstand me and assume that i’m saying only in maldives can you find horny people.

    oh, and it was Nasir, my friend….Nasir died and made me the frikkin leader.

  10. Shihana on

    @anamelol: Actually, it does surprise me still. In hindsight, I can’t say it’s a “shocking” surprise but the moment something like that happens, I do get a little surprised, yes. Maybe I’m a bit naive that way.

    Nasir made you the frikkin leader after he died?!?! So… it’s a psychological problem. Met any other dead people recently? And Prez Anni is going to be really pissed if he hears about this.

  11. DarkCasanova on

    lol.. ok… intresting post compared to the what i do on my blog(dating n social dymamics to the afc guys(avaerage frsutrated chump) here in maldives…

    ok for the first nutbug u met on the internet well.. lets say he watched too many pronos…

    second situation well for ahmed well he reallyy needs to check out my blog..n also have a reality check… 🙂

    and yea guys lov those stuff(it’s in our genes u know :P)

    it’s not everyday when an innocent guy gets group fucked by 4 horny girls who changes everything in his life eventually making him study the female sex for like 3 years head on for mm psychology to body language,etc etc…to finally became sumwhat of a dating guru kinda guy…but hey thats my story

    but then again u cant be labeled as a lesbian juz cause u thoguht of kissing a girl..i mean comon…thats like…wierd…

    maybe i said too much lol

  12. Jummi on

    I can relate to you cux my bestie is openly lesbin and the funny thing is that there are guys who’d talk to her and then after a while she is like I actually am lesbian and mn go like oh HOT can i come watch. Lol being a lesbian doesn’t mean ur a slut. men-> get ur heads out of ur asses and empty the shit in ur brain that was accumulated due to u putting ur heads up ur asses. seriously if i had a penny for everytime i heard this i’d be a gazzilioner.

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